10 Divorce Tips For Working Moms
Divorce is hard for everyone, but the crushing reality is that life moves on and you have to go through mundane tasks like going to work every day. If you’re a working woman with kids facing divorce dead in the eye, then here are some tips to get you through this rocky path. However, the first thing to do is hiring a divorce attorney.
Look After Yourself
Getting divorce papers served can feel like a train hitting you head-on, but instead of crumbling down and letting everything fall apart, you can take out time for yourself. It’s really easy to distract yourself from the inevitable by overworking and letting everything pile up on your emotions, but you need to break this toxic habit and learn to take care of yourself.
If you’re not grounded and at peace with what’s going on, then you’re going to spiral at one point and everything that you’re holding in will flood out terribly. So, take some time off work and prioritize your health and well-being first. You’ll see the difference in no time and you will be able to face challenges with renewed strength.
Prioritize The Kids
Working while going through a divorce is hard enough, but adding kids into the mix can sometimes make things even more overwhelming. However, you don’t want to leave your kids to fend for themselves alone in this critical time.
Bonding with your kids and strengthening your relationship with them should be the goal. Your kids might be having a hard time adjusting to the “new normal”, but you want to make the transition as easy for the kids as possible.
Go out with them and engage in kid activities. This will not only take your mind off things, but the kids will appreciate your involvement in things that they like too. Plan fun things like picnics, dayouts, and even movie nights, because this is the time when you need to bag every morsel of happiness and peace you can.
Have Your Support System Closeby
You might think you’re strong enough to do everything on your own, and you might even be, but it’s not healthy at all, to put on a fake smile and face all of the harsh troubles alone. Your family and friends will be more than happy to help you and walk with you till the end, so let them.
Your family and friends combined is a great support system that you didn’t know you needed. They can counsel you, help you make decisions, and ground you back to reality. They won’t judge you at all, and that’s something you need right now.
Get Legal Help ASAP
Emotional stuff aside, you also need to plan for what lies ahead. You can’t just sit around, playing with your hands while your life is being torn apart to bits. As soon as you get the news of a divorce, you need to take action. Get in contact with a lawyer to draft up a divorce complaint or a reply, whatever the case may be. It’s better if the lawyer you choose is also a good child custody attorney Fairfax VA.
The faster you act, the better it will be for you and your kids. If you’re working and are finding it hard to juggle lawyer meetings with your work schedule, then it doesn’t hurt to take a few days off or request half days.
Consider Talking To A Therapist
There will be times when you just can’t seem to cope with things and that’s completely normal. This is where you want to reach out for professional help from a therapist. Mental health care is so important, but overlooked at times, but you don’t want to do the same.
You want to prioritize your mental health too and that can only be done if you’re seeking help from a professional who deals with such cases on a day-to-day basis. Schedule an appointment with a therapist today and you’ll thank yourself in the future.
Avoid Messy Situations
It might be tempting to throw yourself back into the dating world, meaningless flings, and even risky relationships, however, it’s not the brightest idea, especially when you’re still reeling from the hurt of a divorce. It might also sound amazing to get back at your ex-spouse, but you want to refrain from doing anything too drastic because it will only come back to hurt you in the end.
You want to keep relationships off the list for the time being and focus on yourself. Discover yourself again from a different perspective and you will be surprised to learn so much about yourself that you didn’t even know.
Practice Gratitude
During times like divorce, it can be really hard to be optimistic. However, this is the best thing that you can do for yourself, your kids, and your well-being. Never let go of the habit of practicing gratitude, because it will give you a renewed sense of understanding about loss and what you have that you need to cherish.
Make it a habit to write down things that you’re grateful for. It can be anything and everything. From being able to spend time with your family and children, to being able to provide for yourself and having food on the table; everything matters.
No Room For Perfection
Let go of the misconception of perfection. A divorce doesn’t need to be perfect and you don’t have to know everything from the get-go. You’re not someone who knows everything; no one is.
You learn with every step that you take and mistakes are going to be a part of this journey. If you strive for perfection, then you’ll only crash and burn. Don’t be hard on yourself for being “stupid” or “naïve”, because this is a first time for everyone at some point.
Feel Your Emotions
Bottling your feelings and never crying can be detrimental and it can unleash a monster that’s bigger than your fears at the worst of times. Don’t be embarrassed about breaking down when it gets too much to handle. You should feel every emotion, whether it’s anger, frustration, denial, or even sadness.
Let it all out. If you want to say some things out loud, then try to journal them instead. This will filter your brain that’s most likely a scattered mess of ifs, buts, and maybes. When you feel and let the emotions out, you’ll feel liberated.
Make Sound Decisions
Don’t try to resort to the whole “revenge is best served cold” narrative. You won’t get anywhere with this mindset and you’ll only end up hurting yourself. You are independent and mature, so make decisions that reflect your personality.
Be human and understanding. Maybe you were holding onto a marriage that was never meant to last, so instead of holding on to it with all your might, spend that time and energy elsewhere. Get done with the divorce and move on, because you’ll only grow once you see the light at the end.
Conclusion
Being a working mom and harboring the pain and change of a divorce can put you through the wringer. Use these tips and make sure to move forward with the advice of your divorce lawyer Fairfax VA.